Adoption Update

I have a story for you. It is a story without an ending, so perhaps this is not a story, rather a chapter.
I have a chapter for you. And, regardless of the ending to come this particular chapter is worth writing.

We began the adoption process several months ago for the waiting child program in China. Paper work plugged along slowly, mostly on our part, as we did a bit here and a bit there. Last month Jason came home early so that Samuel and I could attend our monthly In His Hand Orphan meeting. A few months ago several families that had just returned from China with thier new children spoke and introduced us to thier children.  Apparently I was staring because Samuel said, "Mom, can you stop oogling at the China kids?"  This meeting as not about China, but we were excited to go and participate. Running late we took the only seats available which happened to be behind a couple that I had never met before.

The meeting happened. I stood to leave. As I gathered my belongings I overheard the couple in front of us telling a very personal store, that was frankly none of my business. The story was heartbreaking. They had been on an emotional roller coaster. Miscarriages after miscarriage had led this couple to adoption. They had accepted a referral and had made the very difficult decision of having to go back and decline the referral based on new medical information that had come to thier attention.  On one hand they were thrilled at the newly accepted referral of a seven month old baby girl. On the other hand tears flowed for having to decline the previous child. But they knew that it was the decision for them.

 I tapped the woman on the shoulder and tried to politely butt into the conversation. First, I wanted to encourage this couple and let them know that this process part is just that and it will quickly go from process to parenthood.  I can not deny that my heart was quickening at the thought of this little girl. I did not know her name, her story, her age, her medical condition. I just knew that I could not leave without finding out.

Her name is Nan Ling Ling.  She is nineteen months old. She has cleft lip and palate. She has ambiotic band syndrome. She has a mild case of Thallasemia.  

That is what I found out. Jason and I requested more information about her, out of curiosity, truly nothing more. We did not think that we could be matched with her because we are not able to turn in our paper work to China until October. 

Her file came. I fell in love. Immediately.
Jason, ever practical and patient, wanted to take her information to a doctor (or five!) and find out more nessesary information such as what we could expect with surgries, recovery, treatment, and basic explanations for us on each of her diagnosis.  We were told that we had plenty of time to make an informed decision and we were taking it, while simoltaneously kicking it into high gear with all of our paper work.  We spoke with doctors, contacted specialists, meanwhile began adding the name "Nannie" to the end of our Good Nigh Moon song that we sang with the boys before bed.

At the homeschool conference I spent every free minute on the phone talking about Nan to various people. We waited, some days emotionally and others peacefully, for a Word from the Lord to unite us and bring us to a place of peace over this decision together.  Little Nan seemed to consume our thoughts and conversation for a time. One Sunday morning we decided to take a week off of the discussion and planning. We took a Sabbath week. There was very little talk of Nan, only sneaky little kisses on the cheek of her picture. I prayed. Jason prayed. We were quiet on the subject. We were still in our souls.

The Sunday that followed we showed her picture off at church and asked for prayer in our decision, but more so prayer for her.  On Monday Jason came home. Nan's picture was on the counter. We had been teasing a bit here and there that day about other names we might add to hers. It was the first time we had shared such a light heartedness about Nan.  After kissing the boys, taking a moment for the usual wrestles and flips, he headed over to the counter and picked up her picture.

"She is a cutie, isn't she?", he said.  He continued to look. "At first when I looked at her picture what stood out to me was the surgery that she was going to need. Now, when I look at her I see a beautiful girl."

With that we picked up the phone to contact the agency.  A message came through from a friend of mine that works for the agency that she had checked today and Nan was no longer on the list of available children.  We ate dinner, did our nightly routine, put the boys to bed....and cried together on the couch.  I told Jason that it felt as though I had experienced a miscarriage. I was grieving something that I had not yet held in my arms, but was already carrying in my heart. 

A few days later I was printing off pictures for our photo albums. He suggested I print one off of Nan. He said she was a part of our story and always would be.  I did.

We continued to pray for her. We let go of the idea she would be ours. To be off the list meant she had another family and for that we were rejoicing for her.

Another week past. She never left our thoughts.

Yesterday came. 
The director of our adoption agency said that she had been thinking of us and of Nan. She wanted to know if we needed closure. She could find out for us for sure if Nan had a family so that we could move on knowing that she was going to be taken care of. 

She was there.

Then she was gone.

These past two weeks we have processed why God brought her into our lives.
She kicked us into super high paper work gear.
Because of Nan our hearts were molded and prepared to adopt a child that will come to us with needs that we have not experienced before.
The Lord used her to bring Jason and I into obedience and into unity with one another.
We both said if for any reason she comes back on that list she is ours in a heartbeat.


Today.
The boys and I were at the discovery museum. My phone kept ringing. And ringing.
It was my friend at the agency. Nan had been found. She did not have a family.
 Nan still needs a Daddy and a Mommy and we happen to think she could benefit from two big brothers. Today we rushed to submit paperwork and family photos which as we speak are being presented to the China to request that they match little Nannie to our family, permanently.

We are to find out within a week if we have been approved and this little girl will become our daughter.

If we are approved and matched with her then Nan Ling Ling will come home in April (most likey, with adoption things can always be sooner or later!)

Chapter one ends here, with two excited and totally in awe people sitting on the couch wondering what shall unfold in the coming weeks for us and for Nannie.......our Nannie?

Friends, pray.