Finn is due in three weeks. I can't believe this and yet know without a doubt that it is beautifully inevitable. The Moose talks about his baby brother all the time and with genuine interest and hope. However, he has also commented that he will be glad when "Mommy's tummy is small again" so that he can sit on my lap and I can participate in dance fests and running wild down our sidewalks. Honestly, I am looking forward to this as well and being able to put on my own socks.
When I first found out about my pregnancy I spent many a day and night in tears. This was in part to hormones, morning sickness, and a general fear of the unknown. I also was mourning the fact that we had to put our second adoption on hold. I have three specific memories of sobbing, like gut wrenching sobbing, in the stalls of public bathrooms.
Then a few months into the pregnancy, the day I wore a rubber band around my pants for the first time, I entered another stall and accidently shot myself in the face with the band that was supposed to hold my britches closed. This resulted in a smile.
A few months after that I again went into a stall and looked down only to notice that I was wearing my first pair of maternity pants completely backwards, pockets facing front. This resulted in laughter.
Since then, there have been no tears in the bathroom stalls of random restruants and stores. You could say I accepted the pregnancy itself, but what I really think happened is that I accepted the blessing of a child that I had not planned for. My mindset, which had been set firmly on our family looking one way, was remolded and shaken up. When people ask now
what the plan is for our family growth I can happily shrug my shoulder. I don't know, but I am excited to see what happens.
Three weeks, give or take, Finn will be joining us. Wow. Just like his brother did even before we brought him home from Ethiopia Finn has entirely and completely captured us heart and soul. I sit here today thanking God that those tears turned to laughter and that I did not miss out on this child that he had for us.
We are still adopting again. We are officially on hold, meaning only that we are not activity filling out paperwork and progressing our case at this time. But, give us time to find some equalibrium with the newest addition to our family and we will begin moving forwards in the process once more.
With all that said, I wanted to remind everyone (especially here near the Holidays!) that we are still selling those beautiful Bolga Baskets from Ghana as way to raise funds towards our adoption. There is an account that we have that has not been on hold, rather slowly growing and preparing as we wait.
I have no idea when Finn will actually be here.
I have no idea when or who we will adopt our second time around.
I have no idea about a lot of things.
But, I do know that the Lord has already blown our minds with the blessing of Samuel.
I know that once again we are in awe at how our hearts grew and expanded to love our Finn.
And, I know that he has more in store for our family as we trust in his ways.
So~ if you want to see, check out, buy, pass on information about, etc our Bolga Baskets
check them out here. In the meantime, pray for all of us as we anticipate and hope for Finn's official arrival in our arms.
